Sometimes A Good Choice Isn't God's Choice
by Mona Pollina
(Dallas, Texas, USA)
Seeking God when you make decisions is the only way to live...unfortunately I didn't understand that at the age of 17 and it changed my life forever. Let me explain by the way of My Story.
I was basically a “good girl”, raised in church, didn’t drink, smoke, do drugs, mess around, and basically gave my parents no problems. I looked at others as being good and the glass was always half full. But that all changed in my late teens when I found my life totally turned upside down and everything I believed was challenged; when I found myself in a prison of sorts, my innocence stolen and I was literally tortured for almost 6 months.
I admit that I prayed to God for death but it never came. I spent much of my coherent days sobbing in pain and anguish and asking God why? At one point I had cried all I could and didn’t have anything left in me and I told God that I wouldn’t live like this anymore and I heard Him say that what I was experiencing wasn’t His plan for my life. At that point I made a decision to escape or die trying, I escaped.
However, though I was free and safe I was still a prisoner in my mind. I didn’t function mentally or physically for some time. God began to heal me physically first and I appeared normal. I got a job and all seemed well. The truth is because of what had happened to me I couldn’t make the right choices where men were concerned and this caused me much pain throughout my life. Everything would rock along fine and then I would make a choice that was based on my past experience….this went on for years.
Finally, I was sick of the ups and downs and no real success in relationships and I asked God what was wrong with me. He, in all His mercy said “unforgiveness”
. This hit me like a ton of bricks. How could I forgive the person who had stolen my innocence and done the things he had done to me, How?
God gently showed me the
cross and Jesus and how he too was wrongly treated and punished just for for me. I knew I had to forgive. Once I had made that decision, it was then that God began to re-wire my brain, heal my heart and restore me inwardly.
It was then that I was able to receive who Jesus said I was and move forward in my life and become who God called me to be. I was able to accept and receive my position in Christ. You see, I was suffering from “Identity Theft”
Many times our past puts a label on the door of our heart and we begin to believe that is who we are. The label might say:
We choose what label we let rule and reign in our hearts and lives.
You know who I was and what I allowed to dictate my identity for many years but tonight I want you to know who I really am: My name is Mona Pollina
and I am:
• A tongue talking, spirit filled, mighty woman of God
• A warrior princess and Jesus lover
• More than a conqueror
• The apple of His eye
• Fearfully and wonderfully made
• A water walker
• A demon slayer
• A healer of the sick
• A raiser of the dead
• A multiplier of food
• A parter of the waters
• A calmer of the seas
• A mountain mover
• Signs, wonders and miracles follow me!
Some of you might think I’m arrogant but that’s who Jesus says I am and the truth is that is exactly who you are too!
So, I encourage you to take off any labels that you have allowed to remain in your heart that is stealing your true identity and let the only one that matters rule and reign in your heart and life……JESUS
Take and receive His authority, power, character traits and abilities and allow them to manifest in and through you and reclaim your true IDENTITY.